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    <meta name="description" content="初亏  　　太阳开始慢慢下垂，偏移的光线让云朵带上了一点粉红色，今天的云并不是往常块状，或三五朵报团那种样子，而像金鱼身上的鳞衣，琐碎整齐的铺满了整片天空，也把穹顶从人的视线里拔高，天空显得空旷安静。飞机飞过，划下一道白色的粉笔线，坐在公园长椅上的老太太，抬着头，一直看着飞机的轨迹消失。　　老太太在回忆往事，上了年纪以后，总是出现丢三落四的遗忘，更久以前的事情反倒在脑子里越来越清晰，所得到的情绪">
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<meta property="og:description" content="初亏  　　太阳开始慢慢下垂，偏移的光线让云朵带上了一点粉红色，今天的云并不是往常块状，或三五朵报团那种样子，而像金鱼身上的鳞衣，琐碎整齐的铺满了整片天空，也把穹顶从人的视线里拔高，天空显得空旷安静。飞机飞过，划下一道白色的粉笔线，坐在公园长椅上的老太太，抬着头，一直看着飞机的轨迹消失。　　老太太在回忆往事，上了年纪以后，总是出现丢三落四的遗忘，更久以前的事情反倒在脑子里越来越清晰，所得到的情绪">
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          傍晚
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<p>初亏</p>
</blockquote>
<p>　　太阳开始慢慢下垂，偏移的光线让云朵带上了一点粉红色，今天的云并不是往常块状，或三五朵报团那种样子，而像金鱼身上的鳞衣，琐碎整齐的铺满了整片天空，也把穹顶从人的视线里拔高，天空显得空旷安静。飞机飞过，划下一道白色的粉笔线，坐在公园长椅上的老太太，抬着头，一直看着飞机的轨迹消失。<br>　　老太太在回忆往事，上了年纪以后，总是出现丢三落四的遗忘，更久以前的事情反倒在脑子里越来越清晰，所得到的情绪也比当时发生时更多更强烈。就像她今天早上刷牙忽然想起童年弄丢的洋娃娃，那种因为失去心里空荡荡的感觉因为记忆的出现，又重新布满她年迈的心，继而又想起继父对她冷淡、母亲的软弱和和许多零零碎碎的事让她给她带来的类似感觉。这些感觉是如此清晰的印在她的脑海里，像线团掉在地上没人拾起而缠成一团杂乱。<br>　　她不由得叹了一口气，年迈的身体经不起长久的沉浸在这些消极情绪里。她有些疲倦，微微的阖上了眼睛，一点点失去焦距，眼前的景色慢慢变得遥远，公园的园心湖在视线里模糊成了一块白色污渍，污渍边有一些黑点影影绰绰，他们晃呀晃，晃呀晃。</p>
<blockquote>
<p>食既</p>
</blockquote>
<p>　　“妈，你看见我上课用的画笔盒了嘛？”儿子在客厅喊她。<br>　　“没有啊，你昨天不是在卧室用了吗？”<br>　　“我又拿出来了，放鞋盒上了啊，就是怕忘记。”<br>　　“我没看见，你再找找。”<br>　　她继续给儿子打包午餐饭盒，过了一会，外面没有声音，她奇怪：“找到了画笔了嘛？我可没有动你画笔哦。”<br>　　没人回话，她从厨房出来，走到客厅，在玄关的鞋架上看到了画笔盒，不是在这嘛，真是的，这孩子。<br>　　“你画笔我给你找到了，待会记得去厨房拿一下你的午餐饭盒。”她说着话往儿子的卧室走。<br>　　还没走到，从卧室紧闭的门底下漫出了水，不，是鲜红的血，血液越来越多越来越多，多的把房间门都撑开，破涛汹涌在天花板翻了个身，朝她扑来，眼看就要把她整个淹没。。。</p>
<blockquote>
<p>食甚</p>
</blockquote>
<p>　　老太太兀的惊醒，感到背后出了一层细密的汗。身体传来的虚弱感让她对自己感到一点生气，耳边传来一阵笑声，是一个小女孩在用树枝戳水溅起水花的欢笑。那么天真那么甜美的笑声，那么快乐的小女孩，但是，她怎么可以那么快乐，快乐的不像话。<br>　　这会的太阳已经下垂到一半，天空正呈现一种最灿烂壮观的样子，云层仿佛以太阳为起点燃烧，向四周蔓延，成片成片的通红起来，作为背景的蓝天和云朵们的界限也被模糊晕开，天上再也没有一片纯粹的蓝，也没有一片纯粹的红，远处锋利的地平线把灿烂的云霞和稍显昏暗的人世间分开，但仍然有几道光线从云层里漏了出来，像光柱立体，又像纸片单薄扁平，不由分说的要把天空和大地连在一块。<br>　　老太太也有过快乐的日子，年轻时样子好看，被男人们争相追逐，而她像一个待价而沽的精明商人，矜持，吝啬着自己的温柔，冷静的看着男人们为博得自己嘴角偶尔露出的笑容而摩拳擦掌。那会可真是骄傲啊。然而事实也并非表面的样子，她并没有那么骄傲，只是童年缺爱的经历让她缺乏对人的信任感，骄傲和淡漠是为了掩饰内心的虚弱和惶恐，害怕他们看出她好看的皮囊下的浅薄无知。最后，她选择嫁给一个搞艺术的画家。因为某个瞬间的错觉，她觉得他对她不以为意的样子，并不像其他人对她怀着某种不切实际的期待，希望她是或者成为某种特定的人。这让她感到一些轻松，又有他还有一头散发艺术气质的长发。<br>　　教训很快来了。蜜月期还没过，画家旧态萌生，她在家等了一宿，他在酒吧彻夜不归。清晨的争执是以她脸上的淤青和隐忍结束的。之后的生活仿佛就因为这件事裂开了一点缝隙，露出了里面的荒诞不禁。画家开始隔三差五的在酒吧呆一晚上，带着浑身酒气回家。一开始她责备他，但回应她的都是推搡和拳头，于是她学会在他清晨回来前离开，等他身体分解完酒精，从宿醉中清醒再回来。画家喝醉的样子很糟糕，但清醒的时候，有时也会制造一些小浪漫讨她开心，比如某个早上，把她在枕头上掉的头发收集起来，在画板上用胶水，白描勾出一个她，在她做完早饭转身的时候给她看，大呼小叫，我做的，秀色可餐秀色可餐。<br>　　“他真的太会讨人开心了。”这是她那段时间经常和人说起的话，好像是在向人炫耀，但更多的像是在劝慰自己。生活在画家醉酒和清醒里慢慢向前，也随着画家醉酒的时间变长而慢慢变糟。<br>　　一天下午她体检，发现自己怀孕了，从医院回来的路上，她想，有必要和他好好谈谈了，为了孩子，如果继续这种生活的话，她就搬出去一个人住。是不是真的搬倒是其次，得先把态度摆出来。<br>　　“对不起，和我在一起很辛苦吧。我不想再那么辛苦了，对不起。”他自杀了，是在她早上出门的时候自杀的。不知道为什么，当她看见他赤裸的躺在浴缸的血泊里，她竟有种理所当然的感觉，只是想到她原来在心里排练好的和他的对抗和忍让现在都变成了一个笑话，读到他留给她的这些话时，还是情难自已的哭泣了起来，直至脱力，过了很久才打电话叫人，把他搬到医院里去。<br>　　后来她独自度过孕期，分娩，把孩子抚养成人。前不久她的孩子在上班路上，死于一场肇事逃逸。</p>
<blockquote>
<p>生光</p>
</blockquote>
<p>　　月牙在云层里露了出来，公园里的人陆陆续续的收拾东西离开，不时传来大人呼唤孩子的声音，孩子们约好明天还过来玩，依依不舍的分开。<br>　　老太太也注意到天已经黑了，那个在湖边玩水的小女孩还没走，而此时公园除了她俩再看不见其他人了，她心里忽然出现一种戏谑的恶意，她离开了长椅，朝小女孩慢慢走进。<br>　　小女孩浑然不觉，她正抓着树枝，打算用树叶的粘附性把湖水搬运到岸上，她大概是想画一幅画。但树枝上乱七八糟生长的树叶让她到现在还没确定下来到底要画什么。<br>　　老太太缓缓伸出了手，“叫你那么开心”，她手臂突然发力，小女孩来不及尖叫，身体离地，向湖面扑去。<br>　　“扑通！”</p>
<blockquote>
<p>复圆</p>
</blockquote>
<p>　　老太太没了踪影，小女孩在湖里浮沉，她放弃了挣扎，也似乎不想挣扎。她的身体浸泡在水里，像一块吸水海绵开始慢慢膨胀，头发变长在水里四散漂浮，继而又以一种可见的速度变灰，变白，皱纹像一阵涟漪，在她身上荡漾，不到一会的功夫，小女孩完全变成了老太太的模样。<br>　　老太太很平静，她没有死在生活的手里，她是被自己杀死的。<br>　　月亮高高的挂在天上，月光顺从了高楼大厦，在他们的轮廓阴影中间找到了自己的位置。有逃离一部分，在公园的树林里和一群绿色混在一起，风乍起，银色和绿色被凌乱的搅碎在风里。<br>　　老太太沉进了湖底，又好像沉进了那片穿透湖面的月光里。</p>

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